What Are You Saying To Yourself?

Of all the conversations and interactions we have with various people (including family and close friends) in our lifetime, It is those interactions and conversations we have with ourselves that are most important and  valuable or destructive as the case may be.
They are also the conversations that matter the most and are most profound. It doesn't matter what other people say to you or think of you, it is what you say or think that matters.

No matter how positive or complimentary others are to you, if you don't hold the same sentiments about yourself its all futile. In the same vein, if they are negative towards you and you don't hold the same sentiments, then their negativity is futile and has no effect over you.

Therefore, what we say about ourselves is the most important. It is important that we affirm ourselves positively in every way possible and our greatest CHEERLEADERS should be ourselves. Even when things look or seem discouraging it is the conversations we have with ourselves that boosts our self confidence and sends it through the roof.

Having positive conversations with ourselves not only boosts our self confidence but also serves as a motivational force in helping us achieve our dreams. In fact, once we have written down our dreams it is important that we read them out to ourselves daily and begin to picture the dreams as having been accomplished! Say for example, your dream is to become a Talk Show host the conversation you have with yourself daily should be along the lines of:

"I am greatest Talk Show host ever, I learn my and perfect my craft daily. Individuals and celebrities from far and wide want to be guests on my show and my audience is filled to capacity daily. People enjoy listening to me and the TV ratings for my show are through the roof. I am a very likeable person therefore my show is a succes. People find me easy to talk to and therefore feel comfortable around me".

 This idea or notion of speaking with ourselves goes for every area of our lives. If you want to be a better mum or wife or person generally, have positive conversations that affirm the qualities you strive for with yourself and even begin to feel like you are already there as you converse with yourself and you'll see that it will only be matter of time before it starts paying dividends.

I know the type of conversations i have with myself daily and i see the positive effects it has on my life. and i also recognise that they are the most profound!

So start speaking positively to yourselves people and enjoy the benefits!

Writing Down Your Goals

There is something about writing down your goals and aspirations that make them real. I read somewhere recently that until you write your dreams and aspirations down they are merely wishes.

I'm finding that it is important to write these things down because it enables us focus on our dreams and also motivates us to put together an action plan that acts as a catalyst towards achieving our dreams and making them a reality.

There is less danger of you getting off track once you have written down your dreams because you always have the document to refer back to at all times and i can only imagine the sort of feeling you get from ticking items on your list off as you achieve your goals. I can also only imagine that it propels and motivates you to achieve more and also inspires you to dream bigger and add even bigger dreams to your list. As human beings, there is something inside us and our make up that makes us want to achieve more and improve ourselves constantly. We have a gene of continuous improvement imbibed in us.

I watched one of Oprahs' shows recently that serves as a perfect example for this topic. The show was about a Zimbabwean woman Tererai Trent who grew up in a rural village and dreamt of studying in America and having an education even up to a PhD. She wrote her dreams down having no idea of how she was going to achieve them and buried it in an old metal tin in the bush. Years later she indeed moved to America and each time she accomplished a goal on her list she returned to Zimbabwe dug up the tin, crossed off that particular goal on her list and buried the tin again. She has gone on to achieve every one of her goals. All from writing down her dreams. What an inspiration!!!

Tererai encouraging others in her village to write down their dreams
http://www.oprah.com/world/Tererai-Trents-Inspiring-Education/3

I have written down my dreams and goals and would be sharing when and as i accomplish them.

We can go one step further and make vision boards. I'll do a post on that once I've made one of my own.

Dream big and write them down people. Everything is possible, only BELIEVE!

I'm a Perfectionist: Pro or Con?

This i know for sure about myself. I am a perfectionist. I like things just being as perfect as i envision them to be in my mind. When designing the layout of this blog, i already pictured what i wanted it to look like in my mind and i obsessed over all the details until it looked just right.

Then came the time to write my first post and i started obsessing all over again. I haven't really written anything like this before and i wanted the blog to have the  right tone and get my messages across in the way i envisioned. I obsessed almost up to the point where i almost didn't write anymore which led me to this post about perfectionism. 

Being a perfectionist is meant to be a good quality but then how true is that? The phrase 'too much of everything is not good' comes to mind at this time and how there has to be a balance to everything in life. 

Is being a perfectionist a good quality if it stops or hinders you from doing things because it just won't be as perfect as you want it to be. There are times i want to do something and then because I'm missing a little part of what i need (which probably wont make that much of a difference), i shelve it and don't bother rather than making do because then it wont be perfect. Sometimes i spend lots of time driving around in search of the perfect brand of an item wasting valuable time when the other brands i have come across while hunting for the perfect brand would have sufficed. I use only certain brands and shop only in certain places because i believe that's the best and then anytime i have to settle for something else I'm upset because in my mind whatever it is i was trying to achieve isn't perfect anymore and even when i get complimented i still think its not up to the standard i have set for myself.  

Being a perfectionist on the other hand could be a good thing in that you have a good work ethic and take such pride in what you do that your clients or your boss, whatever the case may be can be rest assured that you would always deliver the best you can and even go above and beyond what is required of you. 

I remember when i was working within investment banking in the City of London, my portfolio was always used as a benchmark for the rest of my colleagues because my work was always done properly and i always had the fewest exceptions. Even the exceptions i inherited, i resolved. I was always given the most sensitive accounts to handle and therefore my portfolio was the most valuable and sensitive. I was the one that was always called upon by other stake-holders and colleagues outside my company when they had issues with my work colleagues.

And now in my business, i always make sure i deliver only the best that i can possibly deliver (driving the people that work for me crazy in the process). I pay attention to all the little details.

So what do you guys think? I think there has to be a good balance as with everything else in life. And i am therefore going to make it point not to obsess over things as much as i do especially when it doesn't really matter!

Perfectionist, Pro or Con? Please leave a comment!